ArseWAGS

WAGS....that's what they are called these days. Though it's a harmless acronym (WAGS=wives and girlfriends), this term has grown to symbolize the reason for England's failure in the World Cup 2006. Ever since Vicky Adams walked down the aisle to become Mrs. Beckham, the media kickstarted a whole new voyeuristic look at the glamourous footballer's lifestyle inclusive of their WAGS.

I fully expect a reality series looking into the life and times of a famous footballing family soon.

These are the Arsenal players' WAGs...

Sizzling WAGs

1. Bouchra Van Persie

She stood by RVP when he was accused of rape (which has been dropped) in a Rotterdam hotel in 2005.

2. Tatiana Golovin

Samir Nasri's girlfriend although it looks like an on-off relationship, as she continues her recuperation from back problems.

Glamour WAGS

1. Ana Almunia

The Almunias bought a villa in Hertfordshire and that place turned out to be haunted. No news about them moving out though. Brave people!

2. Yulia Arshavin

An outspoken Russian woman simply for biting the country that will feed her and her excellent footballing husband. Still, Arshavin needs her around so that he can adapt and integrate quicker to the English game. Signs of his silky skills are emerging already with that unstoppable display against Blackburn.

Unknown WAGS

1. Clara

Cesc Fabregas' reported girlfriend. Keeping Cesc on the straight and narrow by moving in with him in London. Not that it did much good since he has turned into a little thug, spitting and cursing...why oh why?

2. Daphne Edinalvo

Denilson's girlfriend who came over from Brazil to keep him nice and warmly tucked in bed, all juiced up for the next match.

We shall continue to keep an eye and ear out on Clara and Daphne as they evolve into true WAGS.

WAGS of the Ex

1. Cheryl Vieira

Trinidadian wife of Patrick Vieira. Were gassed by burglars together with Patrick in their France home some time back. Scary stuff, more so than Mr. and Mrs. Almunia's haunted story. They survived but it must have done something to him mentally because he goes missing in matches for Inter Milan this season.

2. Anastasia Kosenkova

A singer in a Belarussian pop band. Mr. and Mrs. Hleb are the equivalent of David and Vicky Beckham back in Belarus.

He was superb in Arsenal colours, pity he didn't stay too long. He filled the void left by Pires brilliantly.

Hope this bit of news kept you entertained.
Maybe I will do a 20-part Premier League series on WAGS. After all, part I is already completed.